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My trip back home was interesting. Since the million steps down and the 999999 steps back up from the white water rafting experience, my legs stopped working and the pain stopped my knees from behaving normally. The outcome of this was I was walking like I had cerebral palsy or spina bifida - not an act, I just couldn't bend my knees and often found myself falling over nothing standing still. Taking steps up or down was excruciating - I no longer have the knees of the woman I was - I now have the knees of a much older sicker person.

I was very interested to notice how I was treated by the Garuda staff and other travelers. People still pushed past me - walked in front of me causing me to suddenly stop and grip the wall. The flight staff talked to me like I was an idiot. So I thought that was interesting.

The flight was torture.... just as I would fall asleep, literally just fell off to sleep, BEEP BEEP, some crazy person called the airline stewards and the lights would blaze down - and everytime it happened I said "Whaaa??!" This may have been an incentive.

Then my least favourite thing in the world to do... waiting for my bags to come off the plane. I hate that.
Of course the facial recognition software at customs never recognizes me, so there was lots of standing... then..... because I filled in my customs card with care and declared my wooden stuff, the guy says "no I don't want to look at it, just tell me".

Then he wanted to look at my shoes. (?)

Then I was free to go home at last.

Daph has not left my side since I got back.

She just keep purring.

Great to be home - I think the 12 days was slightly too long. But I'm still keen to go over seas next year - but I might need to give Bali a break. USA or Europe? Let's see if I can get the $$$ together.

Signing off
Vic Farrell's obsession with Bali is now terminated.

Counting down

Another 30 mins and I call a taxi to take me to the airport.

My flight is at 11.50pm

Then another 6 hours and I'll see my schnookie.

Can't wait!

Gun shots

Well, today is my last day and I can't wait to get home. I'm finally over the " you want taxi, yes please?" and... "excuse me yes please see my shopping" and "you want massage?" and proceeds to massage me after I told her to, quite clearly, GO AWAY!

Most of the stores have the same garbage in them... Bintang teeshirts, penis shaped bottle openers, crappy watches and lighters and old bottles of perfume.

I think you could make a lot of money selling teeshirts with "No! I don't want a taxi" or "No! I don't want to buy your crappy stuff", written on them in Indonesian.

I have also learnt a lot about elephants. Their feces is the size of coconuts and sound like gun shots when they hit the ground.

Why my legs really hurt.

To start with, I had a foot massage last night due to long walks on the beach and shopping. The massage has resulted in bruises today.

Then I went white water rafting... after taking about 5 million stairs down to the river. I discovered a muscle in my thigh I didn't know I had.

At one point we jumped out of the raft to have a swim, which was great... except... when I jumped in, I was expecting the water to be about waist height since everyone was standing around in it up to their waists.

The spot I jumped into was about 2 metres deep and I disappeared under the water, glasses and all. The ID bracelet they gave me to access my locker floated off down the river.

Then after about 2 hours of enjoying the rapids we had to walk up MORE STAIRS!!!!

Not as many stairs as I walked down (so they tell me) but I reckon is was about 4,999, 999! I  was so slow and looked like I was having a heart attack climbing the stairs. My legs were like jelly. BUT the biggest shame to me was the little old lady who was about 100 years old had to climb all the stairs (everyday, supposedly) with the entire deflated raft ON HER HEAD!!!!

Yeah, so that was embarrising.

Then after we had a shower and got changed we went to the Elephant reserve. I was worried that it might be a bit depressing seeing elephants used as a tourist gimmick, but I was pleasantly surprised. The mahout were so caring and gentle and the elephants seemed really happy and healthy. The recently had 4 babies.. so that's a good sign.

Below are some photos of me with Mona. Mona's mahout is not very good with the camera phone but you can see it's me.

Mona likes noms.

Then we all went on a ride around the park - took about 15 minutes, but the old girls like to stop every now and then for snacks.

Then dinner under the stars and now I'm back in Kuta in my hotel bed looking forward to zzzz.

Luwak Coffee

I like coffee. But the acclaimed 'most expensive coffee in the world'  - luwak coffee, is quite simply awful.

It looks and tastes like diarrhea.  It has things floating in it!!! And beads of oil... ergh!

But I LOVE the luwak. Can you see these these goregous little creatures anywhere?

Nope. They had 2 cranky ones in a cage at a coffee plantation which I wasn't allowed to pat due to the likelihood of them taking one of my fingers off.

Last year I met a luwak on Kuta beach. It was a Lombok mongoose and a pet on a leash. everyone was wanting a pat. It was a schnookie! And I wants one!

Here is a picture of one:

Little fella!

No Bees

Had a good sleep in this morning. But once I stept out of my room there was a cleaner guy saying "hello, hello, clean your room"... crikey was he just standing there waiting the whole time?

The breakfast fair has not changed from last year mi goreng and banana pancakes. Sad to see the bees are no longer hanging around the pineapple jam.

Gili Bum & Road Kill

You have heard of Bali Belly - I have Gili Bum: diarrhea and sore pelvis from riding a push bike along roads carefully carved into undulating bumps and holes to maximise bum impact  on bike seat.

I blame the horses. It's their hooves that dig up the sand on the roads.

Another thing I noticed while in Bali and Gili, there are no dead animals along the side of the roads. I told my taxi drivers that in Australia "road kill" is common everywhere - but not here.

Because, I believe, Indonesian drivers are very careful (Hati Hati) and generous. Australians just mow everything down in front of them.

In Tasmania we saw lots of dead things on the side of the road, and heart-breakingly I saw a quoll! Never seen on in the wild. Only dead on the side of the road.